


Consequences

by RememberTheLadies



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Angst, F/M, Post-Reynolds Pamphlet, and Eliza is done with his shit, hamilton is a selfish desperate jerk, mentions of cheating, she doesn't wanna give him the time of day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-07-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:46:42
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,289
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25384765
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RememberTheLadies/pseuds/RememberTheLadies
Summary: Hamilton goes to talk to Eliza after the Reynolds pamphlet.
Relationships: Alexander Hamilton/Elizabeth "Eliza" Schuyler
Comments: 6
Kudos: 44





	Consequences

He couldn't believe what he had done, what he did to his Eliza. 

When Angelica spoke to him he felt as though it finally hit him how deeply this would hurt his Eliza, but he kept in mind that his Eliza loved him, she was a Christian who would forgive him, she has always forgiven him in the past.

He walked into their room where she was, sitting in front of the fireplace just staring at it, and he wondered why she was looking at it so intently. 

"Eliza," He spoke and when she turned around he almost gasped.

There were no tears in her eyes like he thought there would. Those beautiful dark eyes that once held such adoration for him seemed so very cold.

"What do you want?" She turned back to the fireplace. 

He felt his mouth go dry, he felt afraid. He has never seen his beloved wife like this.

"I've taken that you read the pamphlet," 

"Yes, I've read it." She kept a straight emotionless tone.

He goes closer to her, he almost sat down next to her, but she glared at him so instead he knelt down in front of her "Eliza, please listen to me. I am sorry, truly sorry. I should never have let that girl in our bed, she meant nothing to me."

She is quiet for a moment "Did you love her?"

His eyes widened and he shook his head "No! No, not at all. My heart only has room for you, my love, you must believe that, don't you?"

"You've given me no reason to." 

He looked at her as if she just slapped him "No reason to? You only need to reread the letters I've written you over the years to show how deeply I love you" She chuckled darky at that which confused him, but he kept going "You know I express myself best through writing,"

"This new pamphlet of yours would argue otherwise, I could barely recognize it was your own writing at first. You go on and on for no reason,your insecurities leak through in every line showing how scared you are of how this world sees you," She is shaking her head in disgust "So you ruined the lives of me and our children, and it wasn't even your best work."

He felt tears burn in his eyes, he never seen Eliza be so cruel he was never even sure she was capable of being so cruel to him. What was even scarier is that she hadn't even raised her voice.

"Eliza, I had to do it you know what they were accusing me of!" He desperately tries to defend himself.

"My god, they were rumors! You could have just ignored it, why is it that when your enemy whispers you have to scream, you could have let it go." 

"My reputation was on the line-"

She interrupts him with a laugh "Reputation? What reputation? You dragged our name through the mud, no one else did that was all you. You are your own worst enemy."

At this moment he realized there was no point in fighting her about this, maybe another time he can provide her with his justifications, but now wasn't the time.

"What can I do to make this better? I'll do anything you ask," He pleads.

She stays silent, not even looking at him and it destroys him.

"Eliza please," he cries "I love you, and I know that you love me. There's nothing we can't get through together," he goes to grab her hand, but she pulls away before he is even able to.

"That's why I paid James Reynolds so much, so you wouldn't find out! That's what he threatened me with, he knew that you were the only way to get to me. I hated the idea of you finding out, I hated the idea of this happening."

He is so desperate, and he is crying, pleading with her while she is like stone. Can anything he says or does move her? He is on his knees crying in front of her and she does not show one ounce of mercy.

What has he done to his Eliza? His Eliza was always so full of love and warmth, now she has turned cold and looks so empty inside.

He'd do anything to see her smile, why can't she just show him her smile? Why can't they forget this horrible nightmare and move on with their lives, he wishes to hold her and love her and feel loved by her.

What he hated was that it was far too much to ask right now.

She continued to stare at the fireplace, and he didn't know why. Seeing the fire reflected in her dark brown eyes unnerved him.

"What is so interesting about that fireplace?" He asks her, coming across more aggressively than he intended.

"I did reread the letters you wrote me," She finally spoke "And they now hold no meaning to me. so I burned them."

He looks at her then at the fireplace and back to her "You did what?"

"I burned them. Now when historians study you they'll now only see you for the cruel man you are."

Was his legacy destroyed now? Everything he worked for now just gone down the drain? He looked at Eliza and realized she'd be the only way to fix this mess. With her forgiveness and love, he can get through anything.

"Eliza, please just tell me how I can make things better, we cannot change the past but I must know if there is something I can do now. We're married and we have children, we cannot be miserable forever."

"I could leave." She whispers under her breath, but he heard it.

"Leave? Eliza, no! You can't leave!" 

She turns to look at him with a glare "Why can't I? Papa could take care of me until I figure something out, or maybe Angelica and Church can take me in. I have options."

The thought of life without Eliza scared him more than anything else, she couldn't actually ever leave him. This must be an empty threat, he doesn't know what he'd do if it wasn't.

"You do not mean this," He insists.

She shrugs "I'm not sure, I am considering."

He began to sob "Eliza, you cannot leave me! I would not survive without you, I would die if you left!"

She was once again silent and he couldn't take it, he cried harder than before "Eliza, I'm sorry, I love you, do not leave me."

He began to kiss the hems of her dress, in between kisses he muttered 'I'm sorry' and 'I love you'.

Eventually, she pulled her dress away and stood up "Leave."

"What?"

"I shall stay for my children's sake, not for yours. You sleep in your office now, you have lost privileges to my bed." She told him sternly.

"But, Eliza-"

"Leave." 

He nodded and stood up. He left the room, not without giving his Eliza one last glance. For the first time in their entire relationship, he felt truly helpless.

How could he have done this? He knew he has made mistakes before, but Eliza always forgave him for those mistakes. Maybe he had gone too far this time and not even Eliza could forgive him.

He had no clue when the next time Eliza would bless him with her smile would be, he had no idea when her beautiful dark eyes would look at him with love again, he had no idea when he will feel her sweet kiss again.

What was the worst thing about this is that he has no one else to blame, but himself.


End file.
